7.-11.10. Eva Volmerson: (here and there and not)

Eva Volmerson: (here and there and not)

Opening hours:

7.10. vernissage 17-21

9.10. 17-21.30

10.10. 12-19

11.10. 13-18

Eva Volmerson (b. 1994) is an Estonian-russian artist based in Helsinki. Working with analogue lens-based media, tactile materials, and space, they explore memory, time, voice, and the psychological landscapes of split identities and “becoming at home.” They approach image-making as slow, audio-visual thinking shaped by tacit knowledge and intuitive reference. Look into the tension, absences and gaps.

Essay film yunost’ means youth follows a ghostly sense of belonging to places that were only ever briefly home, carrying a persistent feeling of missing something, or someone, across generations, time, and borders. Borders drawn on maps, and borders drawn inside a family – a continuous grief, collided with nostalgia and daydreams of other times – all exist on one screen. Unable to visit my grandmother’s (Ba’s) house in person, I trace it instead through internet documentation, a digital wandering laid alongside 16mm footage shot on the ground in Massiaru, Estonia — two kinds of arrival, neither of them complete. At its center is Ba, and the doubt that home might not be a place at all — only a certainty that never quite arrives.

I had a dream on thirteenth of August this year. It was sort of a time traveling. We were at my grandmothers apartment just right after she died (8 years ago), everything was the same, as maybe the last time I was there (10 years ago). I felt colors, textures, smells, her recent presence. Me and mom were there. In this dream I carefully look at everything, letting myself gently remember times I have spent here, it was washing my feet first, then knees, my arms and it got to the tip of my head. I went to her room, without her there I was looking at all the details of her “nest”. For some reason first thing I went to – was her closet in this tiny space. When Ba was alive – I never opened it, only now like in secret and in my dream I could do it. For the first time ever. I was taking one thing at a time, showing it to my mom. Simultaneously old photos were running through my memory, confirming that what I found was definitely hers. Purple dress I was wearing as a kid and her wig – now appeared in the closet. I smelled. I felt how present I was in this once very familiar environment. My mom was with me, it felt like I went back to the point where my shared timeline with Ba ended and re-write it. Very relieving. I even thought: “if I did all that just for this dream – it was worth it”.

A year ago I thought of a conversation we could have with my grandmother, if she would be alive… I wonder - would she be my soul mate from another time, a secret keeper for my dreams and worries, a window to see my mom clearer, to see myself childish, cared for?